Senior Moments

What do you say to someone who asks you how to type numbers on a keyboard? This came up today as I sat reading my book at work. Yes, today is a slow day.

As the situation unraveled, I assumed I was witnessing a person having a 'moment'. I've done that myself so I wasn't quick to pass judgement, even though a man of my stature could do so unabated.

For example, I once complained to our doorman at work that all of the escalators were going down and I needed to get to the fifth floor. He quickly yelled a man's name into his walkie talkie and said What the HELL is going on? As we walked toward the escalator it became painfully obvious to both of us that some escalators were going up and some down. With my hand on my face and shame bulging out my back pocket I apologized and told him I must be having one of those days. We laughed it off and I went to work wondering just how much damage I did to my brain in college.

However the circumstances today were just a bit different. Generally speaking when you have a moment it is so embarassing that once you realize your momentary lapse of reason, you can't help but laugh at yourself. After she asked me the ridiculous question, I stood speechless over the lady's desk. All I could muster up as a response was Uhhhhhhhhh and I pointed at the numbers on the keyboard. She looked, obliged, put in her numbers, and said Thank you.

There was no Ooooooh or Oh my lord it's right there or any other indication that she had previously known this answer but had a mental impasse. This lady was somehow a director of a daycare/school, and had first used a computer on this day March 4, 2011 in my office. I feel that it is an honor that I could be part of something so important. I may have to take her aside and call the World Historical Society and see if she'll count as the ninth wonder of the world. 

Normally this is one of those times where I call on evolution to act swiftly, deftly, and with malice towards this person. However, the more I thought about it the more I think this lady is valuable. You see if humans are to survive when an asteroid hits earth, we will need a good number of people who are genetically predisposed to living under rocks. For that reason alone we should keep her around. Everyone serves a purpose, this lady is just completely useless in this day and age.